Tag Archives: marriage

One Month Shy

I wanted to mix things up a little tonight and stray away from sports for a moment…

My husband and I are almost one month shy of our one year wedding anniversary. Even though we didn’t have a normal ceremony with the flowers and the music and even family and friends, I still look back on it and think: 

“That was the best day of my life…and this has been the best year of my life!”

I have enjoyed nothing more than being married to my best friend! I have a really appreciation for him and we honestly have had the very best first year of marriage I could have ever hoped or dreamed for. Come next week, we will have been together for four years. All of that time has just flown by! I can remember the day we met, our first date, when I knew I loved him, and the moment I knew I wanted to marry him. Now don’t let me fool you, we’ve had our fair share of ups and downs, and even broke up for a short time. But even in that short time, we were inseparable! Our love has grown into the perfect shade tree to shelter us from the storms of this life! 

This morning I remember telling him how much I love that we are a team. When I am upset or angry or freaking out about something, he has the power to calm me down. When he is angry and wants to break knees, I have the power to calm him down. For lack of better words, he is my shot of whiskey and I am his glass of wine. I love my husband more than I ever thought I could love anyone! He is the first person in my life that has accepted me with all my flaws and loved me unconditionally! I couldn’t have asked for a better best friend or husband. I got both in him and I look forward to many more happy years! 

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Marriage

Marriage: By definition is the relationship between a husband and wife…

“Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’  and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’ ?  So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate.” -Matthew 19: 4-6

So if marriage is meant to be between a man and a woman, why is there a traditional need to have expensive weddings and celebrate with family members that you haven’t spoken to in years? Well, it’s just that…

TRADITION. 

Now many people would argue that in the Bible it states that they celebrated with family as witnesses. But do we really understand what that meant? Do we really WANT to understand what a traditional marriage in the Bible times looked like? The following graphic depicts exactly the type of marriages we find in the Bible, many of which are no longer practiced today due to government influence…

http://www.upworthy.com/the-top-8-ways-to-be-traditionally-married-according-to-the-bible

If all of these types of unions existed in Bible times and are stories told to our children and within the church, why are these practices so frowned upon now? It could be that moral and social values HAVE indeed influenced the church. Many Christians now-a-days see these unions as “disgusting” or “immoral” yet we cherish the very characters who practiced these unions.

Now, don’t get me wrong, my personal beliefs are that I will only have one husband for the rest of my life, but it seems silly to assume that marriage has always been this way. Yes, marriage in Bible times was originally between one man and one woman, but more often than not, he also acquired her slaves, her concubines, more than one wife, etc. Well we certainly don’t have slaves anymore in the Western world, nor do we have concubines, and polygamy is not a common practice.

I guess my overall question still remains…

Why is a large wedding seen as traditional when we’ve made a decision to honor ONE of the many traditional wedding practices found in the Bible? The answer is still unclear, but the one thing that I do know is that I am concrete in what I believe. I was married to one man, made a public commitment to him before God, and vow to love this man for the rest of my life. I didn’t feel the need to have an huge wedding with lots of people. I didn’t want to get wrapped up in all the details that I forget why I was actually doing what I was doing. Keeping our marriage simple and just between us gave me the satisfying feeling that nothing could go wrong and that I was there for all the right reasons; that I was fully there in the moment both emotionally and mentally. I wasn’t worrying about what could or might go wrong when my back was turned. I was fully aware of my decisions and what that moment meant for us. We came together and walked away husband and wife.

And nothing can change that.